Oh ye, of little sleep, why do you cry so? Why do you cower and hide? Why do you lash out at all and every? Why do you lay your head on your desk and sigh and hope for the day to end? Have you not been promised an end to this suffering? Have you already forgotten that this is not a forever situation?
Oh forget that.
Today I can’t even pretend niceness. I just don’t have it in me… at all.
I’d planned on coming on here today and talking about breastfeeding Mason, but I just don’t want to. I want to talk about not getting any dang sleep lately. None. I am going crazy. For over the past week Mason has been teething. Teething HARD. And he’s not really sleeping. When he is sleeping at night it has to be next to me, generally that’s good. We’re big bed-share-ers in these parts. However, since his gums hurt he continually is biting and chewing on me while he sleeps and I try to sleep. I’ve tried giving him a paci to chew on, but he doesn’t want it. Now he’s running a fever as well and isn’t even sleeping at all except in short cat naps.
Now lets throw Bella in to the mix.
For some reason Bella is also not sleeping, and while she is awake at night she feels the need to come in my room and talk to Mason and play with him. Or to cuddle into bed with John, me, and Mason. I sleep in a queen, that many people, yeah that ain’t happening. I move a lot in my sleep, and you might wonder about the safeness in that with bed-sharing, well, I move Mason with me. I’ve done it with all the kids. When that many people our in my bed I can’t move, when I can’t move I can’t sleep.
I’m lucky to get 3-4 hours of sleep a night now.
Last night I got about an hour and a half. Total.
And honestly, I don’t think Bella got more than like four.
The grand low point – Bella screaming this morning “I don’t like you anymore!” and me yelling back at her “Well, I don’t like you much either right now!”
There is no happy ending to this post, just a release of frustration.